scattering mindless trivia

Archive for May, 2009

Two Peas In A Pod……….

Friday, May 29th, 2009

peas

 

She drives a car just like mine.
Thought you only liked those sporty, hot convertibles.

She eats peanut butter with a spoon straight from the jar like me.
Thought that was gross.

She loves to work in her flower bed and garden like I do.
Thought you hated to get those perfectly manicured nails dirty.
 

She washes clothes only if her family is starting to rewear their underwear, hey same as me.
Thought that was pretty lazy.

She grows vegetables like me and plans on freezing them for winter like I always did.
Thought that was why God invented grocery stores.

She sews and creates fabric art project, just like I love to do.
Thought sewing was lame and for old people.

Don’t look now, Earth Child. And I really don’t know how to tell you..
But (hehe) you have become your mother.

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Sleepytime

Wednesday, May 27th, 2009

bed

When I was single, there was a point where I needed a new mattress.  My present one was years old, and I could feel the coils poking into my ribs all night long………making for a very uncomfortable nights sleep.

After much searching I found a luxurious pillow top which promised to cure all my back ailings and keep me sleeping through the night……..best of all, there was a guarantee.  If for any reason I was not satisfied, I could return it, and replace it with any other mattress they had in stock.

Excuse me………….I’m not just another pretty face, here, folks…..This was a win-win situation all the way around.

The store delivered my new mattress, and removed my old one.  I was so excited to finally get a good nights sleep…………

I didn’t.  It was awful.  My back ached worse than it did with my old one.

Back to the store.  I picked out another one.  Maybe I would go with one not as soft as the luxurious pillowtop.  I decided to try a firmer mattress.

Store delivery, and removal of the too soft pillowtop.  Ok, now! Now I’m excited to get a good nights sleep………….

Wrong! I was up all night tossing and turning.  Couldn’t get comfortable. Maybe too firm?  I was starting to get very frustrated as I made my way back to the store…..for the third time!  I don’t think the sales people were starting a fan club for me at this point.

I chose another one I hoped would be the answer to my prayers.

Here we go again.  Delivery and removal.  At this point I was on first name basis with the delivery men.  I was planning on adding them to my Christmas Card list.

As they pulled out of my driveway, it was then I noticed all the neighbor biddys peeking out their windows from behind their curtains.   It then dawned on me what this looked like to all my neighbors…………I could just hear them:

“Oh my Gawd,……..That trampy little Zelzee……….well, lordy, she just wore out her third mattress in less than four months!!!”

It just made me smile………………..

Rocking Chair

Friday, May 22nd, 2009

rockingchair

We lost my mother-in-law in December, and it has been very hard for my ex to accept her passing, along with cleaning out her home.   So, I along with her caregiver have been  helping him sort and pack up Mom’s items.  (This is ex #1….he and I get along very well)

In one of Mom’s spare bedrooms sat a dusty old manual typewriter next to a stack of books.  I was going through these books and came across some yellowed sheets of paper tucked inside.  There were three copies of the same poem typed on each sheet.  I started to read what she had found so important she had to type three times…………………….:

ROCKING ALONE IN MY OLD ROCKING CHAIR
(Lyrics & Music: Bob Miller)
The Everly Brothers

Sitting alone in an old rocking chair
I saw an old mother with silvery hair
She seemed so neglected by those who should care
Rocking alone in an old rocking chair 

Her hands were all callused and wrinkled and old
A life of hard work was the story they told
And I thought of angels as I saw her there
Rocking alone in an old rocking chair

Bless her old heart, do you think she’d complain
Though life has been bitter she’d live it again
And carry that cross that is more than her share
Rocking alone in an old rocking chair

It wouldn’t take much just to gladden her heart
Just some small remembrance on somebody’s part
A letter would brighten her empty life there
Rocking alone in an old rocking chair

I know some youngsters in an orphans’ home
Who’d think they owned heaven if she was their own
They’d never be willing to let her sit there
Rocking alone in an old rocking chair

I look at her and I think “What a shame”
The ones who forgot her she loves just the same
And I think of angels as I see her there
Rocking alone in an old rocking chair

I was speechless, and just sat quietly numb for the longest time.  I had to digest the words I had just read.

I started to second guess my life with Mom…………

Had I taken the time to stop and visit as often as I could?
Did I call her enough?
Was I there for her in times when she really needed someone?
Did she know, even though sometimes I got busy with my life, I always loved her? 
I hope she did.
I hope she didn’t think of herself as the “Old mother with silvery hair, rocking alone in an old rocking chair.

I will never know…………

Man Theory

Wednesday, May 20th, 2009

yardtools

I am single.

I have no husband, nor am I in the market for a husband. 

Therefore, I have a theory.

Men should be like yard tools.

Yard tools?  Yes………………let me explain.

You keep yard tools hanging in your garage, out of sight.  You only take them down when you need them……… to use them for the purpose they were intended.  When you are finished, you hang them back up in the garage, never giving them a second thought………….until they are needed again.

Perfect.

At least………..that’s my theory.

 

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