zelzee

Where Oh Where Has My Paycheck Done Gone

Packing up my records for last year, I realized that a 6″ stack of papers rubberbanded together represents a snapshot of my whole life in 2008.
Holy mother of debt! how could this have cost me almost every cent I earned?
Let’s see what’s in one year of Zelzee’s life:

AIG/VALIC

My retirement account………………..WHAT retirement account? At this rate I will never be able to retire……….I’ll be working until I drop dead in my office and they drag me out by my feet………………..I can only hope I wear pants to work that day.

CREDIT CARDS

Used ONLY to purchase necessities……….HONEST………..like those cute little jeans I don’t fit into anymore, and of course the darling little tops to wear when I go out…………….oh right, I can’t afford to go out.

HEATING BILLS

Heat? Heat? My house is sooooooo cold that my butt freezes to the toilet seat……………..gotta remember NOT to lick the toilet seat!!

ELECTRIC BILLS

I like to refer to my lighting habit as “Mood Enhancement”. Anyway, I noticed when you have the lights turned on full power, you get to see all those piles of dust! Enough of that………………light off…………

CAR PAYMENT

Color me spoiled……………..walk the one mile to work?…………I don’t think so!

MORTGAGE

Let’s see………………….I pay ALOT of money to the bank, so I can mow, weed, landscape, water, paint, shovel snow, wash windows, perform maid service, trim trees, replace the roof, and caulk anything I can find………………..hungry, hungry house!

GARBAGE COLLECTION

Well, I don’t want it anymore.

CABLE TV

This is a MUST HAVE! I am totally hooked on reality tv, but I would rather tap dance on a bald head before I will admit it.

CELL PHONE

Cell phones are God’s way of reminding me I’m old! What ARE some of these features on my phone?
- “digital dial readout” ……..A bar of soap that talks to you in the shower?
- “tools on the go” ………A jetsetting toolbox?
And where is the “Senior” dial pad? did I miss that option somewhere along the way?

Zelzee’s year was very, very expensive.
The 6″ stack of papers told me so.